THE Worcester News carries a food review every week and never fails to give a balanced critique of a local hostelry’s gastronomic offerings.

I have for some time regarded this feature as an excellent check on pubs and restaurants. After all, the journalist arrives incognito and – apart from the bad luck and fluke factor – staff won’t know who they’re serving.

If only this feature had been running a few years ago when I endured the most unpleasant experience at the hands of a Worcestershire pub… I could have then wreaked an awful vengeance in print. And that’s a delicious thought.

For as many of us know, revenge is a dish best enjoyed cold.

Anyway, the nub of this was that a birthday celebration had been ruined because the staff misplaced our order. Bad rapidly turned to worse and I ended up having a blazing row with the manager, who wouldn’t – or couldn’t – accept responsibility for his incompetence and that of the staff.

Anger makes for a poor aperitif.

When an indifferent meal arrived hours later, I’d completely lost interest.

However, there was a hilariously funny sequel to this. A week or so later, I vented my rage in a Phillpott File… only to have a letter of complaint sent to the editor by the manager of a completely different pub.

The enraged proprietor was convinced that I was talking about his place, even though I obviously hadn’t given any clue as to the whereabouts of the offending establishment. Talk about if the cap fits.

The moral of this story is that the catering trade needs to keep its collective eye on the ball. For you never know who it is sat in the corner perusing the menu with a slightly furrowed brow…