There are a thousand ways to say sorry, which can involve tears, hand-wringing, bunches of flowers or even bended knees.

And the aim, and hopefully result, of a successful apology is to make the people who've been hurt, offended or wronged feel better.

They're usually painful to make and that's heightened when they're public. Perhaps most notably and humiliatingly was American President Bill Clinton's admission to the nation that he regretted lying about his relationship with Monica Lewinsky or film star Hugh Grant's blushing television appearance offering no excuses and saying bluntly he did a bad thing after he'd been found having sex with a prostitute.

But spin doctor Jo Moore's public apology for her now infamous September 11 e-mail, sent within an hour of the American terrorist attacks and suggesting it was a good day to bury unfavourable news, appears to have spectacularly failed to satisfy the very people she most hurt.

The £70,000-a-year aide has come under fire for failing to make any mention of those personally affected by her insensitive action the families of those killed in the disaster.

In her carefully worded statement she says she understands the public's disgust at her terrible error of judgment and hopes people will accept her regret is genuine and heartfelt.

She adds: "It is something ... I find it difficult to believe that I did. It is something that I will have to live with for the rest of my life.

In apparent justification, she says "in life we all do things we regret and that the most important thing is that we learn from them.

It remains to be seen whether Ms Moore will survive the storm of criticism, with some bereaved relatives angrily denouncing her apology as half-hearted.

But better handling of that sorry could have ade all the difference, according to PR guru Max Clifford. And he fears that seemingly unsatisfactory apology may now increase rather than lessen the unfavourable attention for Ms Moore, a special adviser to Transport Secretary Stephen Byers.

He points out her apology comes eight days after her blunder was revealed.

He says: Basically this is too little, too late. A sincere apology quickly given is usually the best way of defusing a situation and stops a drama from becoming a crisis.

"But after this length of time her apology can hardly be described as a spontaneous feeling of sincere regret. Waiting gives the impression that it is a calculated move to save her own neck, rather than being a true expression of remorse for what she did.

Crucially she has failed to address it specifically to the people she will most have offended the relatives. Also you should never make excuses, and in this case you can't justify the unjustifiable.

I think unfortunately this will not be forgotten now because of the way she has handled it. She will have alienated even more people now than she did when her first mistake was revealed.

And he believes that she's failed to realise in common with many famous people and politicians that the British public are willing to forgive and forget the mistakes of those who face up to and admit their errors.

But he says: Apologising seems to be a dying art and sadly humility is certainly not a common trait of the rich and famous. There seems to be an arrogance around that it just isn't necessary to say sorry, and that you can just bluster your way through. It doesn't work. The public respect people who stand up and admit their mistakes, and what they can't stand is detachment or superiority.

He contrasts former Liberal Democrat leader Lord Ashdown with former Tory culture minister David Mellor, who both faced the media spotlight over extra-marital affairs.

He says Lord Ashdown, then MP Paddy Ashdown, who apologised profusely both to the public and his wife, emerged relatively unscathed, while Mellor "dug himself into a deeper hole" by initially posing with his family in an apparent attempt to limit the impact of the allegations.

Recently there have been other instances where swift action might have deflected criticism. Prince Edward initially refused to apologise for actions of his television company in filming in St Andrews, where Prince William is at university, and arousing the wrath of Prince Charles.

Later the company, Ardent Productions, did "apologise profusely and it was reported that Edward had apologised privately to the Queen, but much of the damage was done in front page headlines criticising him for invading his nephew's privacy.

There have, of course, been famous apologies, such as footballer David Beckham's for being sent off for fouling during the 1998 World Cup which contributed to England's defeat at the hands of Argentina.

The Queen memorably apologised to the Maoris in New Zealand for the wrongs of our colonial past, the Vatican apologised for the Roman Catholics' failings during the Holocaust, and the Japanese prime minister made a "heartfelt apology" over the atrocities committed against POWs during the Second World War.

Set against those on the world stage, it makes those private apologies that often cause us so much heart searching and difficulty seem small beer. Whatever, it seems that just saying sorry isn't always enough.