Two quizzes and a chain gang will provide a choice of activities next weekend. The social club will hold its quiz evening on Friday. Details from Nola Pearson on 573259. And the last of the cricket club's winter quizzes will take place at the village hall the following evening under genial Andy Dakin (table bookings: Lorna Dudley on 565422.). In between, ruthless gangmaster Roy Brazier will be whipping his slaves during a working afternoon in the churchyard between 2pm and 5pm on Saturday. All hands will be welcome (Roy is not that bad really!) to help build on last summer's good work and get off to a good start before spring growth gets out of hand. More information from Big Bad Roy on 01886 832672.

While on the subject of the churchyard, we can report that Crimewatch West Malvern (i.e. this column) was successful in flushing out the felon who took the firewood Roy had prepared to burn up churchyard cuttings (Gazette, February 14). On reading the report, a prominent (but anonymous) local resident came forward and confessed that he had acquired the logs for his woodburner. It is understood that a suitable penance has been exacted for church funds!

A personal note to end with. There can't be many people in the village now who are not aware that our two incorrigible Jack Russells, Mini and Widget, after finding a way out of our garden onto the Hills on Friday February 21, and losing themselves for eight long days, were spotted and detained last Saturday by our neighbour Ian Harding. They were apparently making their way home - tired, hungry and thirsty, but unharmed. Despite prolonged and intensive interrogation under strong lights, the dogs have still failed to provide any satisfactory explanation (or apology!) for their absence. For Anna and myself it was a trying time, not knowing whether they were stuck down a hole, trapped in a building, or had been run over or stolen: we will never know for sure. But what we have learned is the kindness of local people, shown in the expressions of concern and offers of help that came forth. We know many of you spent long hours looking for the miscreants. It was a wonderful demonstration of the real community spirit that exists in our village and for us a heartwarming and touching experience. It is a pleasure to be able to share the happy ending. Thank you West Malvern.