THERE he goes, this weekend sailor showing off in front of the kids and treating the river Severn as if it was his own personal race track.

He's the type of person who would be the first to start jumping up and down about incidents of anti-social behaviour on the streets, yet never once looks to himself and contemplates the effect he might be having on his fellow citizens.

A few weeks ago, I wrote of how badly eroded the banks of Worcestershire's great river were becoming. Let me tell you something - the situation is getting worse by the day.

They're all at it this summer. From Bevere to Kempsey, from the lowliest skiff to the mightiest motor yacht, manic amateur matelots are assaulting the last bastions of peace and quiet.

It's always men, too. Most of us know that the roads are packed with male inadequates but their aquatic equivalents can now be observed in ever-increasing numbers.

These people are incapable of doing anything unless it involves speed and noise. Being little boys, they show off like mad in front of wives and girlfriends, all wannabe athletes stripped to the waist, wearing shades and a Bruce Willis grimace that says yeah I'm hard all right.

They'd be fine if contained in the loft conversion and left to play quietly with their Scalextric. But the river is now the latest playground and that is why the rest of must put up with the new Prats of the Caribbean.