CHRISTMAS time can cause "a lot of stress and tension" within families, according two relationship charities.

Relate Worcestershire and Marriage Care aim to tackle this problem - and have produced top tips on how to achieve a happy festive period, even amongst families that have gone through relationship break-ups.

Val Northcote, a counsellor at Relate Worcestershire, said: “Deciding who to spend Christmas with is often a major source of tension in relationships, especially where families are trying to cover all bases.

"This is never truer than for step families where there might be competing agendas, especially where children are concerned.

“At Relate we often see people who have felt infuriated by an ex-partner having somehow 'manipulated’ offspring into spending the big day with them instead. Of course, underneath the anger there are often feelings of sadness, abandonment and failure.

"That’s why if you have a difficult relationship with an ex-partner, finding time to connect, talk and listen to their thoughts and feelings within a neutral environment can be a powerful way of coming to an agreement.”

Bridie Collins, of Marriage Care, speaking about newly-wed couples, said: “Sometimes both sets of families assume they’ll be ‘getting you’ for your first married Christmas and will be disappointed if they don’t.

"If parents protest, keep in mind that this can be hard for your parents, especially if it’s your first time missing the family occasion.

"And it’s likely to be tough for you as well. Reassure them that you wish there was a way to spend the holiday with both families, but you have to make a choice.

"Perhaps you can offer to visit them on another significant holiday occasion or decide to be with them next year.

“What is most important is that you, as a couple, discuss the issue and agree on any decision, compromising as necessary for the sake of your relationship.

"If it’s something you find you can’t agree about, don’t let it become a niggle - seek a little support.”